How do I hold on to my internal sense of expansiveness when the external world makes me feel boxed in by frustration and powerlessness?

When world chaos makes my sense of self shrink, and I lose my way on the sea of societal vitriol and greed, I use two Mussar middot (traits) to steady overwhelming feelings: Ometz Lev (strength of heart, courage) and Zerizut (determination). When I feel off balance, Ometz Lev and Zerizut become my life lines, pulling me back to the shore of my soul. They help me say, ‘I refuse to be swept along by my reactions. I remember my own inner moral compass, and I have the power to choose how I behave and feel.’ I can’t control anyone else’s behaviour, but Mussar teaches that I can control my own. So how do I actually use these middot when I’m caught up in negativity?

1.  Prepare and Notice. Before I open the newspaper or my media feed, I prepare myself for the feelings I know will arise.

2.  Pause. I give myself a fixed window—about 15 minutes—to react without editing, and I set an alarm, since it’s easy to slide into a rabbit hole of despair. When it sounds, I put the media down and check in: am I still overwhelmed, or lost in anger and despair? If so, I move to step three.

3. Steady.  I use imagery to help me use the middot to regain my sense of self. 

I picture myself on a boat at sea, but attached to a rope on the shore. The shore is my strong soul. The rope is made up of the interwoven middot of Ometz Lev and Zerizut.   I keep my attention focussed on the beautiful pure soul God gave me, and I spiritually pull myself along on the rope of Ometz Lev and Zerizut, toward my soul-shore. Ometz Lev reminds me that I am not powerless. I can resist others’ bad behaviour by choosing to behave well and with compassion. My actions may reach fewer people than a politician’s, but they can still model the best in humanity. Zerizut, my determination, helps  me turn away from distress, and toward hope and goodness.

During Elul, the month before Rosh Hashanah, we reconnect with our souls and examine our actions. We blow the shofar each day. Let the shofar be your alarm in step 2. Its blast becomes bound up with our desire to rise above powerlessness and despair, toward the best possible version of ourselves. 

Hear the Shofar, and let it lift you into expansiveness again.